Want vs. Need: Navigating Our Desires
Introduction
“Chasing what we want instead of securing what we need is like sailing a ship with a golden helm but no compass: glamorous but directionless.” This provocative opening challenges us to rethink our priorities, exploring the often blurred line between desires and necessities.
Personal Experience: A Story of Reevaluation
What is your number? I like to ask this question to people because it confuses the majority of them. Here, I am not asking for age or your favorite number. I am asking for the number that you think is enough. You see, as I mentioned in the past numbers are infinite. And if you don’t have a very specific number financially speaking, that you would like to achieve you will always be chasing another dollar. Why? Because you can always have more. But just because you can doesn’t mean that you should.
You have to give before you can receive. That is a rule of life and no one can escape it. So you have to think about what you will have to give in order to obtain what you want. For many of us, we give our entire lives away chasing that money. And at the end of our lives, we realize that we can’t take anything with us and we wasted a unique opportunity to live a life truly abundant. Again, I am not saying that having money is bad. Neither you should not have and pursue your financial goals and become rich and wealthy. What I am saying is that we need to take a closer look at what we really want and realize that there is a price to pay for it.
Not too long ago I was talking with an acquaintance and I could not help it to kind of envy him. His business is booming, he is hiring more people constantly, he buying every guy toy that you can imagine; money seems to be falling from the skies for him. A short while after that encounter, we had dinner and spent some time together with our families. There we talked more than just business. The veil was torn and we talked more about personal things.
It was not that long after we started talking that I realized; I really don’t envy this guy. If I have to pay the price that he is paying to have the money that he has, I don’t want it. You see, on the surface, everything looks beautiful and peaceful. But dip down there is a tornado going on that we just don’t see and in many cases care to investigate or ask. You see other people driving expensive cars, living in very big houses and we say; it must be nice, assuming that person had it easy. And that person must be very happy and comfortable because of all the possessions that he or she has.
Not knowing that either they paid, or are paying a high price for all the things that they have and we are not talking about money. I am talking about their health, relationships, families, and in the worst-case scenario their salvation. Nothing worth having in this life comes easy. So another question is; Are you willing to pay the real price for what you want or you are comfortable with what you have? Many times we focus and concentrate so much on what we want that we forget that we already have a lot.
We get confused very easily and say I need this and I need that when in reality the majority of those times we should be using the word want. Many of us have everything that we need. But again, we spend so much time and energy thinking about what we want that we don’t appreciate what we already have. It is highly likely that if you are reading this, you have a place to live, you have a job, a business, or some source of income. You probably have a way of transportation that takes you from point A to point B, and perhaps even a healthy family. You probably have at least 3 meals a day too.
That alone should be enough reasons to be extremely grateful and to realize that we are super blessed and that we have more than what we need. In many cases the thing that we are chasing we already have, we just have not taken the time to notice it. Happiness sometimes is hiding in plain sight. It is called contentment. Freedom is knocking on the door but we are not willing to open it because we are afraid that the things that we are holding inside will leave.
Let’s be honest with ourselves and do an assessment of our lives and our possessions. If we do this assessment honestly I truly believe that we will realize that the majority of us already have what we need when it comes to material stuff. Perhaps we concentrate too much on what we want and don’t want to focus on what we really need because in many cases is easy to occupy our minds by thinking about the stuff that we want instead of the things that we need.
For example; We may think about the new and bigger house. Or maybe the brand-new Toyota SUV or Pickup Truck. Or the latest iPhone or Android cell phone. And we can call all these things needs. But are they really needs or wants? If we are honest we can quickly realize that they are wants and not needs. Again, nothing wrong with wanting them but let’s call them for what they are. Now things like becoming a better husband, a better father, and a better citizen, are things that we need. But because they don’t sound fun and you don’t see a material return in our actions and behaviors we try to avoid doing them or don’t give them the importance and priority in our lives that they deserve.
How about losing weight and becoming healthier? This one personally hurts me because I have struggled with my weight my entire life. This is something that I definitely need. But am I doing what I need to do in order to lose weight and become healthier? The answer is no. Why? Because it is easier to think and work on the things that I want and on the possessions that I can accumulate instead of dealing with the issues, behaviors, and things that I need to change my life for the better. Let us stop lying to ourselves and call the things in our lives for what they are. If they are wants, go for it. Nothing wrong with wanting stuff. But the same way if they are needs, go for it. And don’t be afraid to change because, at the end of the day, those uncomfortable changes will get you closer to the best and better version of yourself.
Data: The Psychological Impact of Wants vs. Needs
Research by the Consumer Psychology Department at Stanford University reveals that individuals focusing on wants over needs tend to experience shorter bursts of happiness that diminish quickly, leading to constant dissatisfaction (Stanford, 2020). Another study by the American Psychological Association indicates that prioritizing needs leads to long-term fulfillment and stability (APA, 2019).
The Problem: Misplaced Priorities
The crux of the issue lies in our tendency to confuse wants with needs. This confusion can lead to financial instability, personal dissatisfaction, and business inefficiencies, as we allocate resources to less critical aspects of our lives and work.
The Solution: Aligning Priorities with Purpose
To align our actions more closely with our true needs:
- Assessment of Priorities: Regularly evaluate your personal and professional life to distinguish between what you truly need and what you desire.
- Budgeting for Needs First: Allocate resources to meet your needs before spending on wants. This ensures stability and prevents resource depletion.
- Mindful Consumption: Practice mindfulness to make informed decisions that resonate with your long-term goals and well-being.
Adopting these strategies helps balance our approach to wants and needs, fostering both personal and financial well-being.
Conclusion: The Balance of Want and Need
Understanding the difference between wants and needs is crucial for lasting satisfaction and success. By focusing on our needs while responsibly managing our wants, we can achieve a more fulfilling and sustainable lifestyle.